I've had Stevie Smith's poem Not Waving But Drowning going through my head in the last few weeks as I struggled with the often 11-hour long days of looking after 3 high-energy kids on my own. This is my version of it:
I saw her out at sea
Larking with her kids
I couldn't see their faces
Were they laughing, or screaming?
The kids held her down
Sinking under their weight
Yet she found the pier
And gave them safety
They didn't look back
She didn't follow them
Where had she gone?
Taken by the waves
Away from safety
Away from herself
Away from her kids
Now screaming for mummy
She swam for her life
Longing for more energy
To come up for air
As waves beat her down
Clinging to control
Clinging to sanity
A body drained of life
Not waving but drowning
I see her face now
She looks just like me
Even the kids look like mine
Oh God, she is me.
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